First Class Trudging

Quiet Mood

Tue, 29 Dec 2009 15:42:15 GMT

Not much to report. Survived another holiday season. I'm trying to finish a long overdue project for Skyrealms of Jorune, my favorite dreamtime world.

This video made me want to post. I really think this woman is one of the best animators I've seen. Up there with Miyazaki or Tex Avery for watchability.

Trichrome Blue from Lois van Baarle on Vimeo.

And for a little ray of environmental hope, let's look at the plastic bag problem.

Boxing Day

Sun, 27 Dec 2009 02:55:39 GMT

Happy Boxing Day.

I survived another Christmas, or Saturnalia.

Now for that New Year's thing.

How y'all?

A Day Up

Tue, 03 Nov 2009 01:55:54 GMT

I am following doctors orders. I felt much better yesterday and it took everything I could do to keep from jumping up and running somewhere. But I didn't.

Today, better. More better. Much mo better fine.

And this looks like it will be interesting.

Avatar Trailer in HD

Trailer Park | MySpace Video

Remembrance

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 19:36:27 GMT

I am doing something rare. I am following doctor's orders.

I feel MUCH better today. Inhalers are amazing and I was able to sleep for about six hours uninterrupted (and that was a for a bathroom visit). My pattern has been to rest long enough to feel better, then take of running until I wore myself down again.

Time off is rare, even tho I am on disability, and most of my activity is between my ears, and this time off has made me very contemplative.

Today, the day after Halloween, is All Saints Day. It is also a day of remembrance, particularly for the ones we have lost in the past year. For that it means several close friends and in my spiritual/intellectual life there are others.

So it seems appropriate to remember them today.

Nancy. Sean. Rusty. Steve. I miss you.

Just another brink in the wall...

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 03:01:48 GMT

And I think I'm building a

Last night i got out of WakeMed, the local "big" hosital. There are three, and all three are in the top five Heart Centers in the US. It is where I had my bypass surgery and who wrote the letters to authenticate my application for disaibility.

I called 911 Wednesday night/ Thursday morning. I couldn't breath. I've had trouble breathing for months, but this was bad. I could only breath sitting on the edge of a seat or the bed, and leaning foreward.

I called 911 and they sent out medics, who called an ambulance and I was in the ER in 20 minutes. It was looking like I had another heart attck, but there were things that didn't fit - like my heart was performing just as well as it was before (I get LOTS of doctor's appointments).

My old comedy partner has COPD so I have someone who knows me and can help me out with that.

This means I will have to give up some of my overcommitments ... and that really means I need to throw out more of my clutter -- which I was planning on doing. I actually found a 12-Step group called Clutterer's Anonymous. It might SOUND like a joke, but it is serious and, like the other 12-Step programs, the things I gather (and won't throw out) are NOT the problem. It is an indoator of more work to be done in me.

I had been quite pleased that i have been able to get shod of a lot of thigns already. In LA and San Francisco I had multi room appointments filld ... and I am talking paths blazed to get through rooms. When I left california I redued 4 rooms of collected boxes, books, recores and and tapes (into which I lump my eClutter of CDs and DVDs) down to one moving rental truck and the inside of my pick'em up truck.

When I left for North Carolina I further reduced my world to what fit in my pick up (1992 Mitsubishi, not a big pick up) and the nose of a friend's moving van to Virginia - about 10x8x4 so about 20 boxes, my big chair and some bookcaes.

My stuff in North Carolina has grown a bit, but it is now in a half a bedroom, plus another half a bedroom (that is about a full room I guess) plus the clutter in my shed - 8x10x10, but only about 1/3 full.

My goal is to reduce all this down to one half a room - which should fit in a 2 bedroom mobile home.

I'll post more about that as it happens - people who know me know my clutter problem and the difficulty it has been to have me as a roommate as a result of that problem.

I've wasted enough time that I can take my breathing treatment and go to bed. I think I'll get some sleep.

And now for something completely different:

What's that in the Punchbowel?

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 19:04:29 GMT

I went to a memorial for a friend who dropped dead last Thursday (heart attack). This man was an alcoholic who found Recovery, healed his relationships with this brother and daughter (last members fo his family), and who spent the time since he found sobriety working a local detox to help those who came after him. About 200 people showed up.

His own pastor could not show up so someone else lead the opening prayer and the eulogy, followed by four or five of his friends telling their story of how he effected their lives as a friend.

So then one of our local fundamentalists wacko's saw 200 people and felt she had to get up to Testify. And she did. Ranting about Jesus, getting the name of the man we were gathered to remember wrong ...

She may as well have jumped up and down yelling "Look at me!! Look at me!!"

"Gee, mommy, when I grow up can I be that all self important and self wacko self righteous?"

"You already are, my child. You already are."

Here are some people using bad words to express my reaction to this selfish and self centered display - they say it so much better than I could.

WARNING: This video is exactly what it says it is. Click only if you are over 21, or very childish and self centered.

Friday, nothing happened.

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 18:49:48 GMT

Last Thursday a friend dropped dead. He was a relatively young man - 47 - and appeared to be in good health. Great surprise to everyone, even him.

Friday, nothing happened.

Saturday I hit a deer. First time. A bunch of them darted in front of the car and I avoided all but one. Called animal control to see if it was still alive and when they got there, it was gone. It took out my front grill -even more than it had been taken out by me rear ending another car at 5MPH. Animal Control said I was the third deer strike in that immediate area that night. They may know something we don't, but the don't know how to play Dodgecar.

Sunday was in rehearsal for an upcoming workshop on Sponsorship, and it was great. After that I played cared with my dad and sat in to help out on a class I used to teach at the Healing Place. Very satisfying.

Monday I bounced a check for the first time in several years - it was less than $1, but I was spanked with the overdraft charge. I was able to get down with a deposit that covered the overage and the fee and have enough to get gas for the rest of the month (the car, not me).

Tuesday was the memorial for my friend Steve, which was really great except for hte psycho woman who didn't know him, wasn't the person we had invited and very clear on her religous superiority and why YOU need to come see her after the meeting to come to Jesus. 200 people were there just to hear HER. Actually, we were there for Steve. Oh well.

and Wednesday - today is Wednesday.

I eagerly await the day's unfoled. : \

Bricked Mac - Time-Lapse from RP Cuenco on Vimeo.

My Banana Peel Mind

Tue, 29 Sep 2009 13:49:02 GMT

It has been so long since I've posted to Live Journal - or even looked at what my friends have been posting.

Car out of commission for a month, then knock-down flu, just getting over that. Did some other things less dramatic and satisfied with some creative things I've been doing.

Trudge trudge trudge ...

No link...

Wed, 09 Sep 2009 04:29:10 GMT

Found this link - no embed code, but worth a look see ...

http://www.insideshort.com/

Quiet day. Did't leave the house. Having the car back is great, wish I had the energy I need to get going.

Maybe tomorrow.

Releif

Thu, 03 Sep 2009 22:10:23 GMT

Despite all my whining, I tend to isolate when things aren't going well. I get quiet.

For the last three weeks my car has been dead. I took it to the owner of the local raceway, who has an auto shop, and it took him over a week to find the real problem. But he found it, and today I have a working car. I was able to pay the bill. September will be tight, but most months are tight, and I have a working vehicle.

To celebrate, I think I will by a printer from craigslist. A duplexing printer so I can publish my little tracts on sobriety and spirituality on an as-needed basis. Found a cheap one, so ... I'll go pick it up tomorrow ... in my working car.

A friend had prostate cancer surgery and we are waiting to hear the results, and the prospects are good.

Two of my sponcees got jobs today - must be something in the water.

I don't complain ALL the time. :o)

Here is a video of college kids playing with their balls.

Trickey with Balls - The funniest home videos are here

Confessions of a Font Addict

Sat, 22 Aug 2009 05:24:55 GMT

I'm a graphic designer, of whatever ability. I love the shapes of certain font sets and designs. There is one I have been trying to find since I last had it on a Letraset lettering sheet in 1975 - Antikva Margaret. I did find it in a professional set for $225, and I may be an font addict, but it is too much to pay, even for that font.

But on a run through google looking for fonts, it turned up at a site that is the best despository for fonts I have yet to find. For the past two weeks I have been strolling through the fonts that begin with "A". There are over four hundred pages and I've only gotten to 285, and I think THAT is compulsive. http://www.fontpark.net - go if you are looking for a font or if you are designer who needs to find a spark.

Not Trendy

Fri, 21 Aug 2009 02:37:44 GMT

Bleh. Another bathroom oriented day.

And I'm probably years behind the curve, but I heard a mention of this video on the news and went to see it. Cool, yes. Fiber no.

The same couple did a television ad for a divorce lawyer, using the same rehearsed bridal party choreography. On the news it was carried as the "couple from the dance wedding wind up in divorce court after just six months of marriage..." And that ad was cool, too.

Two Days Off

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 07:10:49 GMT

I don't know when the last time was I took two days off. Stayed in the house. Got a ride to a meeting last night and stayed in today - have driven since Sunday and tomorrow I plant to get over the local garage to see if my car can be repaired at all.

I surf the web a lot - there is a 3-year old Romonian girl who sings, and when you hear there is a 3-year old singing, you get an image in your head. The song is good, her performance is very good. I am showing in her native language - there is an "English" version, but I don't understand it.

And if you are more in the mood for an appreciative giggle, try Men In Suits.

tink tink

Sun, 16 Aug 2009 10:37:00 GMT

My car is non compus mentis [sp?] - down but not dead. Maybe someone will be able to tell me something about what is really wrong with it tomorrow.

I'm enjoying some down time, sleeping and putting off doing important things I shouldn't be putting off - maybe that isn't such good thing. But it feels good.

Found this. Very silly. So of course I had to post it.

No Change

Mon, 10 Aug 2009 05:42:43 GMT

Well, still I have been 59 for about 40 minutes and so far no great difference. It looked like one of my toes was going to fall off this past week,b ut this morning it went from dead (necrotic) to badly bruised. I guess my neuropathy seems to prevent the nastiness from hurting, so I didin't notice. At some point I must have dropped something on my foot and not noticed. Three days the inner 1/2 of my left big toe went black. I mean BLACK. Indigo. Absorbing all available wavelengths.

But this morning it is all maroon and purple, sothat is improvement. I guess I still have some circulation, but when someone uses the word "amputation" I tend to pay attention.

Did all of the international celebrations get off on time? I know my birthday is not recognized is a national holiday in some of the primitive countries, but we - thank goodness - are englightened..

Damn.

Same old stuff.

Here is a disturbing video showing what appears to be someone else shooting JFK. I think it is fake - I hope it is fake - but it does put up a good arguement.d

OCD

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 06:09:13 GMT

For some time I have wondered about my own behavior for possible OCD. There are certain things I start and am compulsed to finish ... even when it make s me late or it is time to go to bed.

Fortunately, these nice people created a website to allow you to diagnose yourself. The question is how long you will stay with it. I barely made 5Km, so hang in there. You cannot go back to catch something you missed.

Missing things

Sat, 18 Jul 2009 09:14:45 GMT

We lost Walter Cronkite.

Nobody told me.

That's the way it is.

Lawdy, He'p Me

Wed, 08 Jul 2009 03:00:59 GMT

Today I lived in ignorance, and not because of my usual choice to be ignorant for a day. ABC was running the Michael Jackson Funeral, NBC was running the Michael Jackson Funeral, Headline News was running the Michael Jackson Funeral, CNN was running the Michael Jackson Funeral ...

And then the news report was Michael's mother wanted to body brought into the Staple Center to make it a real funeral -- she didn't want it to be a Hollywood spectacle.

Forgive me for sounding like Little John but ...

WHAT?!?

It is enough to make me want to go after somebody with a rake!! Or a pick axe. Or a cheese slicer ... MAKE IT STOP!!!

Health and Pride

Wed, 24 Jun 2009 11:30:22 GMT

My procedure went well today. The c-word was not in the conversation, and I have to learn to live with diviberticulosis. Along with diabetes, the heart/lung EF, double bypass and neuropathy, it should not be difficult.

Because of the colonoscopy I ate nothing from Sunday afternoon until Tuesday afternoon, and except for the force drinking of the "prep" had nothing to drink for 13 hours. Which made me crabby.

I also got no sleep Monday night/tuesday morning, came home and screwed up my schedule by sleeping from 11A to 11P with some breaks in dreaming.

But I should have stayed down.

I insisted on doing several things; outlining a new project, cleaning up some others.

But I made a bad decision. I kept running into finder.dat files from my old OS9 system archives, and decided to remove them in bulk. And rendered my computer worthless. I could not restart it and am sure that I destroyed a FINDER.DAT that was NOT part of my OS9.

I should have waited until I investigated the individual files.

Fortunately, recently I downloaded a Bootable Utilities Disk from the OSX system usegroup. And it worked. I was able to boot from the DVD and run a utility that rebuilt the desktop and restored my computer.

But I was tired, knew I wasn't up to par but insisted on DOING.

I am frequently accused of being a Human Doing, instead of a Human Being.

Still, after all this time, and with meditation and constance reminders of the simplicity possible, I return to a Human Doing.

And I am always happier when I am a simple Human Being.

Guilty as charged. And maybe, some time before I die, I'll get it right.

Memory and Explosive Colon Blow

Mon, 22 Jun 2009 19:18:38 GMT

Having no memory sucks.

When I set up for my colonoscopy last month, I was given a prescription to start at 3PM today, and three pages of instructions for diet and medication. It is 3:14P and I just found the prescription, called my pharmacy - they are out of it, and found another pharmacy where I can get it, but they don't know if it will take my insurance, so I'm off for another adventure of "Can He Afford Medicine" - and I know I'm not the only one playing that game.

The prescriptions will have me clean for in the morning. That means I'll be taking the meds every 15 minutes, running to the bathroom every 5 minutes, and swearing the whole time.

The only reason I know any of this is my doctor's office called me back with "haven't you already started the ..." whatever the cleansing technique is called... and told me I already had the prescription and the instructions, otherwise I would not have looked.

So I'm crabby. Some part of my poor little rotting brain remembered something so I took myself off solid food yesterday. I am not supposed to take Lovenox tonight or tomorrow morning - good thing I found that instruction.

I'm in for a fun fun fun eveing and night and morning...

Bleh.

Firflies

Sat, 20 Jun 2009 19:26:33 GMT

When I lived in California, I was told the fireflies had died off.

When I was a little boy I used to love to go out onto the grass in the evening and be in the middle of the "lightning bugs." And, I admit, I used to catch them and found if you squished as the light came on ...the light stayed on for a while.

Many fireflies died in my wonder of their light.

But whoever told me the fireflies had died out was wrong. Last night I came home at sunset at the yard was filled with fireflies. I turned off the motor and sat in the car with the windows open. It had been a hot day and even "down to 80" is cooling off, so I sat and I watched them signal their readiness to find a mate in an aerial dance.

I was five years old again, for just a moment.

None of them had to die for me to be filled with wonder.

Sometimes the moments are quiet and just right.

2012

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 07:57:49 GMT

I follow Danny Glover's Twitter, and this just appeared...

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810045661/trailer

Strange for its own sake

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 21:01:34 GMT

Okay, this is just strange, but I like strange...

Bright side

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 05:08:08 GMT

Wow.

The Lovenox prescription is marked at $896 for a week of the med ... and I'm on for two weeks ... the week before the procedure and the week after.

I don't know quite how the Lovenox is different from the Cummadin, but I'm not an MD, I don't even play one on TV.

But I paid $12 for the two weeks, which I think is a savings of ($896+$896=$1792-$12)
Um - 1780$US.

I do think our health system needs rethinking.

I am surprised - I had two contributions through the donation page - thank. I have enough for some groceries, tank of gas and can do it again next week.

Very grateful.

Really.

Whenever someone does something nice for me I worry about manipulation - is it manipulation to say what is going on, or should I just take the risk of the colnoscopy without a blood thinner? Non-stop bleeding sounds bad - to me. So does a stroke.

But Like I said, I'm not an MD.

You know who you are. Thanks you.

Here is another Craig Ferguson musical number.

Another Day

Mon, 15 Jun 2009 19:22:49 GMT

Tomorrow I start the change in medications for the procedure ... yea? I make another change in 3 days, then in 5 days after have the procedure, then 5 days after have a whole other set of adjustments for the return to "normal" fistful of prescriptions.

But I like it.

This will probably be the worst month I've had in quite while for finances. I have been coming up with virtual world odd jobs, but nothing this month and nothing on the horizon.

Several rounds of antibiotics and prescription changes, plus the visits to several specialists, all come with copays and threw my budget off.

I am not down to zero yet, but with one more tank of gas will be. I'm going to ask my dad for money - he's getting over the shock of how much his uncovered medical / nursing home costs have destroyed his "extra" money and every dollar he puts out comes with a long lecture on the value of money ... so I think I'll be getting a lot of lectures.

I still have a donation page, but that isn't something I count on. Once in a while some slips me $20 or $50 or the like and they seem to choose the best times without me saying things.

Trudge trudge trudge, as they say. Or as I say.

A friend sent me this - talk about things I am not going to own ... gorgeous.